Finger In The Wind

Putting a finger in the wind is to reach a corporate twaddle decision arbitrarily, with no clear rationale. This is often how business is done, based on a hunch or sometimes just the need to be 'doing something or looking busy'. Weather boffs and sailing types like to know which way the wind is blowing; of course it may not be (see above picture where there is a flat calm). So here the finger raising would be energy wasted and more useful things can be done with the no-longer-raised digit. Bonus tip: Try not to mix your office-speak expressions unless you are an advanced practitioner, e.g. "Don't put your finger in the wind and call it due diligence"!

Gap Analysis

"Gap analysis" is about comparing actual performance with potential performance, or (in layperson's terms), "seeing how woefully we are missing what we are supposed to be doing". If there is a gap, then plan on bridging it tout de suite, certainly before anyone important notices. In the above picture two lots of gaps are in evidence: [1] The country on the horizon is not in The EU, the country in the foreground is. Lots of people have analysed the gap between them and successfully navigated it. [2] The wonky ladders on the shoreline also bridge gaps, making it easier for the people mentioned in [1] when they arrive. A border control gap analysis is underway. 

Speed Boat Change

The full office-twaddle expression is "You can't turn a tanker round with a speed boat change". This basically means that an organisation is so set in it's corporate ways that it won't be budging thank you very much. Speed boats are a great change and can pep up the 9 to 5 BIG TIME: They offer benefits such as all-round office views, fresh (as opposed to recycled) air, plus the ability to go REALLY FAST!

High Flying

The above sign is from outside a French business and "Vol" means flight in French. 'High Flying' means very successful, especially academically or in  business. It is often marked by extravagance, pretension or excessive ambition. So 14% Vol is far less pretentious and to be applauded..... unless you're actually flying: If so, the missing 86% is going to become very important, nay critical. You may not be flying at all. 

Back To The Drawing Board

A phrase used to indicate that an idea, scheme or proposal has been unsuccessful and that it is time to draw up a new one. A drawing board used to be a large flat piece of wood on which paper is spread by architects, artists and designers. Now they just click their mouse around a screen. Hence, a 'drawing board' is so old-fashioned that "going back" to it may indicate it's time to retire or learn a whole set of new, up-to-date phrases to impress people with. The above drawing is done on a board - and that's really where any similarity ends.

Checks And Balances

A phrase meaning 'making sure you're not going off on one'. However, here we see that it's simply about checking that the team can actually balance. An out-of-balance team is not what you want.

Have Your Cake And Eat It

You really can't "have your cake AND eat it" because the practicalities of eating it mean that the cake will no longer be intact. This is primary school science but unfortunately is frequently conveniently forgotten by over-optimistic executives. If you ever hear one of these stripes use the phrase followed by "... so step up to the plate and face the music.."you'll know it's time to resign before someone gets hurt. To fully enjoy your cake, have it, then eat it, Simples.